Ridiculous State Laws in the US

triviaAt least some of these are TRUE – not sure what the problem is with ice cream and mustaches, nor why we’re only safe from nuclear detonations in Utah.

Pennsylvania, to no-one’s surprise, has the BEST state laws. Perhaps the mystery of why drivers are so bad in the Keystone State may have finally been solved.

Alabama

  • It is illegal to wear a fake mustache that causes laughter in church.
  • Putting salt on a railroad track may be punishable by death.
  • You may not have an ICE CREAM CONE in your back pocket at any time.
  • Masks may not be worn in public.
  • It is considered an offense to open an umbrella on a street, for fear of spooking HORSES.

Alaska

  • MOOSE may not be viewed from an airplane.
  • While it is legal to shoot bears, waking a SLEEPING BEAR for the purpose of taking a photograph is prohibited.
  • It is considered an offense to push a live moose out of a moving airplane.
  • Clowns BEWARE! (Anchorage)
  • It is considered an offense to feed alcoholic beverages to a MOOSE. (Fairbanks)

Arizona

  • Any misdemeanor committed while wearing a red mask is considered a felony.
  • DONKEYS may not sleep in bathtubs.
  • A decree declares that anyone caught stealing soap must wash himself with it until it is all used up. (Mohave County)
  • It is illegal for men and women over the age of 18 to have less than one missing tooth visible when smiling. (Tombstone)

Arkansas

  • It’s strictly prohibited to pronounce “Arkansas” incorrectly.
  • ALLIGATORS may not sleep in bathtubs.
  • Honking one’s car horn at a SANDWICH SHOP after 9 PM is against the law. (Little Rock)
  • Dogs may not BARK after 6 PM. (Little Rock)

California

  • SUNSHINE is guaranteed to the masses.
  • It is illegal to shoot at any animal except a WHALE from a moving vehicle.
  • Nobody is allowed to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool. (Baldwin Park)
  • City Council order reads: “No dog shall be in a public place without its master on a leash.” (Belvedere)
  • You are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you already own at least two cows. (Blythe)

Connecticut

  • In order for a pickle to officially be considered a pickle, it must bounce.
  • It is illegal to walk backwards after sunset. (Devon)
  • You aren’t allowed to cross a street while walking on your hands. (Hartford)
  • You may not educate DOGS. (Hartford)
  • It is illegal for a man to kiss his wife on Sunday. (Hartford)

Florida

  • All computers and smart phones are banned from all Internet cafes.
  • The state constitution allows for freedom of speech, a trial by jury, and pregnant PIGS to not be confined in cages.

Georgia

  • DONKEYS may not be kept in bathtubs.
  • Signs are required to be written in English.
  • No one may carry an ICE CREAM CONE in their back pocket if it is Sunday.

Hawai’i

  • All residents may be fined as a result of NOT owning a boat.

Idaho

  • It is illegal for a man to give his sweetheart a box of candy weighing less than fifty pounds.
  • You may not fish on a CAMEL’S back.
  • Riding a merry-go-round on Sundays is considered a crime.
  • Residents may not fish from a GIRAFFE’S back. (Boise)
  • A person may not be seen in public without a smile on their face. (Pocatello)

Illinois

  • The English language is not to be spoken.
  • Law forbids eating in a place that is on fire.
  • It is illegal to give a dog whiskey.
  • It is forbidden to fish while sitting on a GIRAFFE’S NECK.

Indiana

  • The value of pi is 3 (which is mathematically incorrect).
  • Baths may not be taken between the months of October and March.
  • MUSTACHES are illegal if the bearer has a tendency to habitually kiss other humans.

Iowa

  • A man with a mustache may never kiss a woman in public.
  • The fire department is required to practice fire fighting for fifteen minutes BEFORE attending a fire. (Fort Madison)
  • The “Ice Cream Man” and his truck are banned. (Indianola)
  • HORSES are forbidden to eat fire hydrants. (Marshalltown)

Kansas

  • If two trains meet on the same track, neither shall proceed until the other has passed.

Maine

  • You may not step out of a plane during flight
  • To stroll down the street playing a VIOLIN is against the law. (Augusta)
  • It is illegal to park in front of Dunkin Donuts. (South Berwick)

Maryland

  • It is illegal to remove a public building by writing on it. (Rockville)
  • No GORILLA is allowed in the back seat of any car. (Massa)
  • Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked. (Massa)
  • An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public. (Massa)
  • BULLETS may not be used as currency. (Massa)
  • It is illegal to go to bed without first having a full bath. (Massa)

Minnesota

  • A person may not cross state lines with a DUCK atop his head.
  • Citizens may not enter WISCONSIN (not Minnesota!) with a CHICKEN on their head.
  • All bathtubs MUST have feet.

Missouri

  • Installation of bathtubs with four legs resembling animal paws is prohibited.
  • It is illegal to drive with an uncaged BEAR.
  • It is illegal to scare a baby. (Mole)
  • It shall be unlawful to provide beer or other intoxicants to ELEPHANTS. (Natchez)

Montana

  • It is illegal for married women to go fishing alone on Sundays, and illegal for unmarried women to fish alone at all.
  • Hard objects may not be thrown by hand. (Excelsior Springs)
  • WORRYING SQUIRRELS will not be tolerated. (Excelsior Springs)
  • Balls may not be thrown within the city limits. (Excelsior Springs)

Nebraska

  • Drivers on mountains should drive with caution near the right hand edge of the highway (there are NO MOUNTAINS in Nebraska!)
  • If a child burps during church, his PARENTS may be arrested.

Nevada

  • It is illegal to drive a CAMEL on the highway.
  • Everyone walking the streets is required to wear a mask. (Elko)

New Jersey

  • It is against the law for a man to knit during the fishing season.
  • It is against the law to “frown” at a police officer.

New Mexico

  • IDIOTS may not vote.

New York

  • A person may not walk around on Sundays with an ICE CREAM CONE in his/her pocket.
  • While riding in an elevator, one must talk to no one, and fold his hands while looking toward the door.
  • No SLIPPERS past 10pm.

North Carolina

  • It’s against the law to sing off key.
  • ELEPHANTS may not be used to plow cotton fields.

North Dakota

  • It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep with your shoes on.

Ohio

  • If one loses their PET TIGER, they must notify the authorities within one hour. (Canton – in response to the incident with the zoo a few years back, I think)

Oklahoma

  • People who make “UGLY FACES” at dogs may be fined and/or jailed.

Oregon

  • ICE CREAM may not be eaten on Sundays

Pennsylvania

  • It it illegal to sleep on top of a refrigerator OUTDOORS.
  • You may not catch a fish with your hands.
  • Any motorist driving along a country road at night must stop EVERY MILE, LIGHT UP A ROCKET SIGNAL, WAIT 10 MINUTES FOR THE ROAD TO BE CLEARED OF LIVESTOCK, and continue.
  • You may not catch a fish by any body part except the mouth.
  • DYNAMITE is not to be used to catch fish.
  • You may not sing in the bathtub.
  • Any motorist who sights a team of horses coming toward him MUST PULL WELL OFF THE ROAD, COVER HIS CAR WITH A BLANKET OR CANVAS THAT BLENDS WITH THE COUNTRYSIDE, AND LET THE HORSES PASS.

Rhode Island

  • Any marriage where either of the parties is an IDIOT or LUNATIC is null and void
  • Railroad companies may be held liable in some instances for scaring HORSES.
  • A permit must be obtained to fire a MISSILE.
  • You may not sell toothpaste and a toothbrush to the SAME CUSTOMER on a Sunday
  • It is considered an offense to get a tattoo.
  • It is illegal to display a confederate flag on a courthouse.
  • HORSES may not be kept in bathtubs.
  • By law, if a man promises to marry an unmarried woman, the MARRIAGE MUST TAKE PLACE.

South Dakota

  • It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep in a CHEESE FACTORY.

Tennessee

  • It is a crime to share your Netflix password in Tennessee.
  • You can’t shoot any GAME OTHER THAN WHALES from a moving automobile.

Texas

  • The entire ENCYCLOPAEDIA BRITANNICA is banned in Texas because it contains a formula for making beer at home.
  • When two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has gone.
  • It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.
  • It is illegal for one to shoot a BUFFALO from the SECOND story of a hotel.

Utah

  • It is against the law to fish from HORSEBACK.
  • It is illegal NOT to drink milk.
  • It is illegal to detonate any NUCLEAR WEAPON.
  • BIRDS have the right of way on all highways.
  • It is a felony to persistently tread on the cracks between paving stones on the sidewalk of a state highway.
  • It is illegal to cause a catastrophe.
  • Alcohol may not be sold during an emergency.

Vermont

  • At one time it was illegal to tie a GIRAFFE to a telephone pole
  • All residents MUST bathe on Saturday night

Virginia
It is illegal to tickle women

Washington

  • It is illegal to pretend that one’s parents are dead.
  • All LOLLIPOPS are banned.

West Virginia

  • Whistling UNDERWATER is prohibited.
  • It is illegal to snooze on a train

Wisconsin

  • It is illegal to cut a woman’s hair.
  • State Law made it illegal to serve APPLE PIE in public restaurants WITHOUT CHEESE.

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